Wednesday, January 4, 2012

SIL, the drama unfolds just a little more.

Boy o boy, are you sitting down with a cup of tea?


Today I am going to attempt to give you a rdc version of my SIL. This SIL is my husband’s only sibling. I know that once you have been around the bubble for a while and start reading about SILs it can be confusing. Considering that I have had 10 total I will try and label. If it has a number before it, it is one of the brother’s wives. But today I discuss, Hubby’s sister.

As I mentioned, she is my husband’s only sister and growing up they were very close. It has been told to me that they looked like the Campbell soup kids.

MIL and FIL sometimes worked opposite shifts with the kids home on their own a few hours by themselves. They learned how to cook, clean and do the laundry. This is something that my hubby has instilled in to our children as well. But I regress, they were very close.

SIL started dating hubby’s friend and after a few years they got married.

Now this is where I may sound very mean and hurtful but I am sorry, there is NO love for this woman in any way shape or form.

The skuz that she married was the cheapest bastard that you may ever meet and she learned very well from him. About 4 months before they got married the discussion came up about where they would live and my hubby’s grandmother kiddingly said they could live in her basement if they could not find anywhere else. 2 days later skuz and his skuzzy father came by to start building an apartment.

The skuz and SIL leached off of gram for YEARS. They were charging her for mowing her lawn and doing simple fixer upper things around the house. They paid no rent and paid only half of her heat and electricity. They paid nothing on her water or any additional things. Leeches!!!

Ugh,

Gram had major knee surgery and decided that she could not keep up her house any longer and decided to sell. Skuz and SIL freaked out because she would not sell them her house for 2/3 of the cost. His idea was that this was SIL’s inheritance and since she had 3 grandchildren she should sell to SIL for 2/3. Effen Arse!

They bought a house that they paid cash for all but $20,000. I am not joking when I say cash. Skuz did not believe in banks so he pulled $70,000 CASH out of the walls of the grandmother’s basement walls. SIL supposedly knew he had money just not that much.

Skuz was an arse. I won’t get into much about the details of the next three months but needless to say when SIL came home from getting her drunk on one night, Skuz was sitting in the dark with a shotgun pointed at the door so that when she came in she knew it was time to go.

SIL had been having some sort of affair with this guy that she knew when she was younger and hooked up with him and moved into an apartment. The apartment was a pit and they decided to move. Told the landlord but never looked into getting anything else. The landlord kicked their arses to the curb on the last day of whatever month and they gathered up their stuff and moved into my in laws summer camp. No running water, no shower, no tub, no toilet, no heat, a literal shack in the middle of the woods. They moved in their 4 cats, which were not fixed, and lived there for a few months until it got too cold. Then they lived in a motel room for a few weeks and left the cats there. I won’t get into much with this because they destroyed my in laws camp and that is just too horrible for me to get into.

SILs divorce went through and they bought a 5th wheel trailer and moved into a campground. Not a trailer park a campground that is only open a certain many months a year. They cut a hole in the side of this trailer and put in a wood stove when the temp started dropping.

Fast forward a few years…

SIL got sick and was hemorrhaging. She was brought into the hospital almost dead. It took three days for the bleeding to stop and for her to be brought back to consciousness. Dipshit boyfriend never told the parents.

When SIL was confronted by in laws as to why they were not notified she stopped talking to them for months.

SIL needed a car for a new job and the in laws cosigned. SILs boyfriend sold someone a stolen gun, he got arrested, they argued, she took off, she cracked up the car, she would not go home and started shacking up with this other “coworker” and refused to pay any car payments because the car was no good anyway.

Bank came to in laws to pay off the car.

SIL went back to other boyfriend and bought a new trailer in a new campground and got married. He violated his parole and she left him and now is on boyfriend number to high for me to count.

All in all we have spoken (me and the hubby) three times to SIL in the last 14 years. Once was when the FIL almost died with his infection back in 2004, once when gram died 5 years ago and MIL asked me to request an absent note from the undertaker otherwise SIL would lose her job, and once a few months back. Seriously don’t know what is wrong with that girl but I am too old to worry.

Have a nice night. Tomorrow I will let you know why all the in law talk is taking place.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

MIL...hard to explain

I hope you all had a very happy holiday stretch. Whatever you may celebrate, I hope it was joyful for you and yours.


Now back to the bubble.

When I left you last I told you all about my FIL and today I need to tell you a little about my MIL.

My MIL is one of those really quiet women who when she speaks you listen because she doesn’t speak that often.

When my hubby and I were first married, and I mean first married, she called me because I spent the night out. The call came in at 7 am after coming home about a half hour earlier. The hubby had worked at the same business as she did and complained because I didn’t come home.

Let me back up a little because this sounds like I was this horrible person.

Hubby was going on a long haul and was leaving at 2 in the morning to set off to New York. He left me at a bar with some friends and left me reliant on someone else for the ride home. I didn’t want to go home to an empty house where I was going to be all by myself in the dark. So when my ride made no move to leave I didn’t push it. Remember, this was newly married and I had never lived anywhere but home and college.

Anyway, the call came in just after I got home. This was the last time she attempted to be my mother. She called and said, “Did you have a nice night out?” I said “yes”, she said hubby “was worried and that bothered her.”

At first I was a little shocked that she would call me and then in the heat of the moment I told her that both my parents were still living and her son chose to marry me and if he were worried he needed to speak to me and not have his mom do it. She told me I was right and it was never brought up again.

Since then she and I became friends as well as family. We taught me how to play golf. We golf a few times a year together. We play cards together for money and for not. We have vacationed together. Things have always been just fine.

I am not sure how this sweet woman could have been hooked up with as an angry young man as my FIL but she did and it has always worked for them.

My MIL had a mother that was some sort of angel as well so maybe that is it.

But something that never happened before now has happened. She won’t talk to me anymore.

Just before Thanksgiving my MIL came to see me on Saturday morning and asked me to play golf with her at this turkey shoot. Two days later she called and said that she was not going to play with me that she was going to play with me because she had asked her friend Val first. I asked #8 to play with me and he asked a friend to play. This put me back into a situation without a partner so #5 played with me. We had a blast. But here is the kicker. I showed up that morning and MIL was without a partner. She had no one to play with because Val was rushed into the hospital. She had known this for 3 days at least. She didn’t call. We would have figured it out for her.

Anyway, then the whole birthday fiasco took place and when I talked to my hubby he had no answers knowing full well that she always felt comfortable talking to me.

Christmas Eve has always been a night with the in laws. We have switched back and forth at the different houses over the years and this year was supposed to be our year. We offered and said whatever would be easier. FIL said it would be easier at our house unless the weather was bad and then they wanted it at their house. We were fine with that. Less than 24 hours later the hubby came home to tell me that it was at their house. No explanation, he showed up there to pick up Butter and the next thing he knew his mother told him Christmas was at their house and she would explain at another time.

We still don’t have an explanation.

*shakes head and shrugs shoulders*