Monday, August 22, 2011

Need to stop the ride...

I have been having one hum dinger of a month and my emotions are in overload.


I realized today that it has been a whole month that I have been riding this rollercoaster of a life and today I am asking when it is time for you to just throw your hands up in the air and let it all go?

My family has been feeling the same tension and frustration and it is not a good thing. We are all testy and perhaps it is all for the same reason.

I had a dream. Well, we had a dream.  A want maybe is the better word for it.
For those who have been following for a while or even know me, know that I spend the entire summer at my summer home.

We have been doing this for the last 15 years. My husband has never known a summer that he did not spend it at our camp or the one next door.

Back about 11 years ago we were told that we would have the opportunity to buy the land that we currently rent that our summer camp sits on and build a house of our own. In the year 2011 the lease would be up and we would have the option.

Wouldn’t you want to look at this sunrise every morning?

That has changed. We now would need to buy an entire house that someone else built on the land for $500,000. Who the hell has that kind of money? Not me!!!!

We are down to our last full week at Rocky Pond and the kids are fighting. So bad that Jelly gave Peanut a black eye for teasing him about taking the last Twinkie.

I am rude to my friends and snapping at the slightest thing that NEVER would have bothered me before. Believe me when I say, I can take a lot but not now. Things are not “nothing” but I am definitely reacting a lot stronger than I would have in the past.

I am crying on my way home from work because I am overwhelmed there.

I SNAPPED at the cable people because I can’t seem to have them understand that someone disconnected my cable from the phone and they claim I “never called them or put in an order for a disconnect”.

I am sorry to spew my mental grief but I needed to let it all out somewhere before I snap at the wrong person.

Me and stress have never been bed fellows unless you count a hospital bed.

3 comments:

Kristina P. said...

Your blog is definitely a good place to vent.

AmyLK said...

Oh this is heartbreaking to have to leave this wonderful place. No wonder everyone is snappish. You blog is the place to spew if you need too! I'd cry too. I'm so sorry for you and your family to have to go through this.

I'm here if you need to vent some more. HUGS.

M-Cat said...

It is one of those times to just throw up your hands! So sorry friend. At least with a roller coaster, you gotta go back up right? Let's hope for an up that stays that way!