Now Serving Number 7

Writing about my brothers the last few weeks has made me realize a few very important things.


1. There is an entire generation coming up through the ranks, that are doomed by their forefathers…HA HA HA…that is funny because it really is because of their fathers. I have 4 nieces and 9 nephews, and I myself spawned 3 offspring (males). The only benefit for my offspring is that they are not going to be cursed like I was growing up as being ONE OF THEM.

2. My mother has continually told me since I had my second child, “I never dealt with any of these issues you seem to have”. No shit, if my mother had an ink-il-ing what we did as kids she would have killed us.

3. Life in my little bubble here on the internet is so much fun. I can spew all of the shit that happens and over the next few weeks there is bound to be tons of it.

Now on to the brother #7…

I really cannot even start explaining why my #7 brother is the way he is. Well, maybe a little insight into his past will give you some light.

#7 was born 11 months after #6. My mom went for her 8 week check up at the doctor and told him how sick and tired she was. The doctor blew it off. He told her that she had 6 kids at home she could not expect to just jump up and be feeling great again. So she took his word for it. When she missed her second period, he told her that she was just stressed. When she could not keep anything down and knew f-n well she was pregnant he did a test and VIOLA! She was right. However, when they did the ultra sound, yeah right, like that happened back then, they gave her a due date that she KNEW was too early for him. #7 was taken at least 3 weeks early. Hence the fact that, he was the tiniest of all of her children and had many health problems. #7 was the only one born with asthma. Others developed it later. He spent many a days in and out of the hospital and doctor’s offices. He could not keep weight on (believe me, that has changed). He got a lot of attention.

#7 was seriously put out that #8 came around 3 years later. He really was a spoiled BRAT, with a mouth on him that should have been washed out with soap. He got away with it. My husband tells the story of when we were dating; now remember my husband knew all of my brothers for years before we actually dated, #7 at the age of 11 asked my husband if I sucked his “youknowwhatsy”. NONE OF HIS F-N BUSINESS FOR 1-AND SO NOT APPROPRIATE FOR 2.

He still is that way now. In his thirties, he has been fired and boycotted by friends for his mouth. He realizes that this is an issue after loosing 8 jobs in the last 3 years. DUH, took you long enough. But here is the kicker, he has two little boys and his oldest one is 6. For the last two years he has thought it was funny to show off Little#7’s ability to recite all of the swear words you are not supposed to use in public. WTF! This kid is doomed.

Let me tell you another little tidbit that needs to stay between you and me…You cannot tell his wife ANYTHING! You know the game we used to play as little kids? Telephone or Operator or whatever it was and you tell the first person the first thing and then it goes around the circle? Yeah, she messes it up all the time. But in the bad sense. She twists it and turns it so you end up as the bad guy for everyone to deal with. It comes from her family, I am pretty sure. When they were getting married, my mom and I got numerous phone calls from her mother and grandmother saying things that kind of went like this:

Gram- “MaeRae, Diana wanted her theme for the shower to be blue and gold”

MaeRae- “okay, I will pick up the paper goods tomorrow at the Candle Factory”

Gram to othamotha- “I just got of the phone with MaeRae and she won’t pick up the paper goods”

Othamotha to mymotha- “Gram just told me MaeRae is refusing to participate in the shower because she hates my daughter”

Mymotha to MaeRae – “Okay, what the heck started this string of phone calls?”

MaeRae – “I will call and find out”

MaeRae to Gram – “Is there a problem”

Gram – “oh no honey, you said you were going to get the paper goods-all is good here”

Dealing with my SILs is a lot like this if you start with #7’s wife.

They are having some serious marital problems. Something about non-trust and stealing money from the household fund…I don’t know and don’t want to know. #6SIL started telling me about the issue at something just recently and I told her that unless my husband’s third uncle twice removed was in the story, I didn’t want to hear it. There is nothing I hate more than gossip. (BWAA HA HA…what the hell am I doing here? Oh yeah, that is like gossip isn’t it)